Wednesday 19 August 2015

Goat Simulator PS4 Review


Goat Simulator is easily one of the stupidest games I have ever came across, come on it's a game were you control a goat! Any person in their right mind should never spend "real" money on a game as epically stupid as this... I clearly am not in my right mind and I did indeed spend my "real" money on this game and I urge every single one of you to do the same thing it is something you have to witness for yourself.

I came across Goat Simulator on the PC when I watched a couple of Youtubers play it and thought it looked sorta kinda alright but nothing to run out and get asap. Maybe that was because my laptop was broken and I had nothing to play it on. To my surprise when checked the Playstation store on Tuesday to see if there was any updates and there it was "Goat Simulator" on the PS4. I knew it was only a matter of time before I gave in to temptation and bought it but I didn't, well not then anyway.

Fast forward to Saturday night and having just arrived home from my parents house I got online and joined my good friend John in a chat party. He suggested that we watch a live stream of someone playing Goat Simulator to see what it was actually like and would it be worth trying. When we did find a decent stream it wasn't too long before laughter ensued, it was hilarious some of the funniest footage from a game I had seen in a long time. A few seconds later John disappeared from the chat only to return a couple of minutes later to inform me that he had bought the game which was inturn my mind made up, I was buying Goat Simulator.

So after a few minutes of downloading I was in and faced with choice of starting in GoatVille or Goat City Bay. I chose the later and we were in, it didn't take to long to get the main object of the game... destroy everything and that's what I did wrecking every fence in my path. After leaving the spawn garden I noticed a petrol station so off I trotted towards it determined to headbutt it and when I did it set off a huge chain of explosions that sent my goat 50 ft into the air and when he landed on the road he bounced. Now I don't know if you ever seen a goat fly through the air and bounce when he lands but if you haven't you're missing out it was one of the funniest things I have seen in a while I couldn't breathe for laughing. My next hour was spent trying to recreate something as funny with varying levels of success but each as funny as the last, even the epic fails were hilarious.

Admittedly there are other less fun tasks to do in Goat Simulator there are 30 goat trophies to find in both areas, 3 building blocks to find that look suspiciously like Minecraft blocks, the hat simulator where you have to find bundles of cash to buy the six hats in the window of the hat shop, stop the hillbilly from driving in the cornfield, lick the hand glider, trash goathendge. There are also mini games to play throughout the game these include Box pusher, the Nokia classic snake and Flappy Goat a version of the painstakingly annoying flappy bird. There is also an achievement for finding and gatecrashing a performance by the guest star Deadmau5. Another blatant rip off can be found in the sewer and the end of which you can find four guys dressed in green with different coloured masks obviously meant to be the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

There are several "mutations" available within the game, mutations are basically different skins for your goat and some even change the species the range from angel goat and devil goat to tall goat (which is a giraffe) and classy goat (which is a penguin). Each of these mutations can be unlocked by various means some via obtaining the aforementioned trophies and the rest by their own quests. The angel goat is unlocked by doing no damage for 5 minutes, the devil goat is unlocked by bringing five sacrifices to the pentagram on the hill. Most of the achievements are made much easier by using angel goat and double jump and my personal choice of mutations. The mutation add another level of fun to the game and even way to travel as the giant goat is actually a whale that can only move when in the water.

The main downfall of the game is replayablity once you finish all achievements/trophies there really isn't much to do. Yes wrecking stuff with a goat will never get old but having nothing to do or achieve makes it get slightly boring very quickly. This problem in my opinion could be remedied by introducing online multi-player, this game would benefit so much. So for this for me anyway the pluses outweigh the negatives and this is a great wee game well worth the £6.65 (including the 10% PS Plus discount). I would recommend this game to anyone to games or just anyone with a sense of humour as weird as mine, it was enough to keep me entertained for the whole weekend and if it did bring in online mp I will be back to play it without question.


GOOD- It's a Goat causing carnage to it's surroundings which is awesome, it's funny, it's addictive and it's a great way to spend a weekend gaming.

BAD- Lack of online multi-player makes the game feel really short and limits the amount of time you'll want to spend playing it.

Verdict- A very stupidly funny game that'll have you in wrinkles laughing more times than you'll care to admit, could be better but for a game made as a joke it certainly is no joke. I would happily give this game 7/10.


Monday 1 June 2015

My week in gaming

Hi and welcome back to my week in gaming guys. This past week has been dominated by Destiny's house of wolves dlc and my continued progression to level 34. This week also seen the reveal of a need for speed reboot and Fifas first TOTS.

We will start this week by talking about the TOTS in Fifa. The community TOTS was first up with all the players that had been consistent all season without getting an Inform card. Headlining the team was Jackson Martinez, Claudio Marchischo and Nemja Matic. The was also a Silver and Bronze squads but no MLS players which was highly disappointing for me as the MLS TOTS wont come out til the All Star game mid summer. I bought the Matic card for my BPL team and hopefully the upcoming TOTS I can get a few more blues.

Then came the news that this years Need for Speed was going back to its roots triggering rumours that it would be Underground 3. And when the teaser trailer launched it only served to fuel the fire, later in the week Ghost games added that although the new game is not Underground it does take alot of the elements that make that game great. You check out the teaser trailer on Need for Speeds official Youtube channel which I highly recommend you do it looks amazing.

Finally the House of Wolves expansion dropped for Destiny last week and if I was made to describe it in one word it would be "awesome". The Prison of Elders has been a revelation much better than raids that had been used as previous end games. The trails of Osiris, the online game mode has been a tad hit and miss for myself and my team as level does matter and being tortured by level 34s is annoying. Hopefully next reset day the Prison loot is leg amour so I can get to 34 on my warlock and be on a level playing field for the trails. 

So that was my week in gaming, next week I'll speak about finishing my Ultimate team, more Destiny and Women in Fifa 16. So once again thanks if you took the time to read this and see you again next week. 



Monday 11 May 2015

My week in gaming 17/5/14

Sorry this post is incredibly late I shall explain later. Hi an welcome to my week in gaming. This is the first time I have tried this and I really hope you guys enjoy it. Although this week wasn't the most glamorous or exciting of weeks it was highly enjoyable, well for me it was anyway. This week's highlights where the reveal of Assassin's Creed Syndicate, Pro Clubs victories and finally starting a decent career on Fifa 15.

I have played alot of pro clubs this year and have at times really enjoyed it. So the logical next step for both myself and my team was to challenge ourselves in an online league. We joined a league called the FPL and at the halfway point we lead the league but unfortunately the admin closed it before we could officially claim victory. At the minute we play in the Fcc britianna league which includes some of the best teams in the world. We have started well only losing 3 of our games two of them being to fifas best who I am adamant we would have beat had we had our goalkeeper playing. Our aim is to finish top 4 this season and fingers crossed we can continue to play well and will achieve our goal.

Apart from pro clubs this past week I got around to starting a manager career which intend to finish. I started of at United with the aim of doing what I thought they should do this summer transfer window. Also after a few weeks I got my perfect international management offer with the United States a perfect job for me as I follow both the USMNT and MLS so I know nearly all the players well. I simulate all my matches in manager mode because I think playing games defeats the purpose of the mode. As of writing this I have reached season 2025/26 and won pretty much everything I could possibly win with both club and country including the world cup. I have remained loyal to both teams I started with building both into strong forces mainly by signing young American prospects to United. If this fifa is like past games I have only five years to complete my career and although this mode could be alot better I have really enjoyed it and look forward to completing it.

Lastly this past week seen the announcement of the next Assassins Creed game Syndicate. The game is set in London in 1868 during the industrial revolution and feature a brother and sister assassin duo named Jacob and Evil Fyre. The game looks so much next gen than Unity did probably due to the fact Syndicate is being developed exclusively for next gen consoles. I have pre-ordered it on the Playstation store as soon as it became available and am really looking forward to playing it once it launches.

Finally I must apologise for this post being late as while I was finishing up writing this Destiny's 2nd dlc launched and I have been playing that non stop for the past few days. I will be talking more about it in the next post as well as the teaser for Need for speed and the first tots in Fifa. So until next time thanks for reading and as always all comments are greatly appreciated.

Tuesday 28 April 2015

Hi I'm Bryan

I set this thing up a few weeks ago with the bright idea that it would give me something to do when I'm bored. A place to write about my love for gaming and what I get up to while playing them though I've been struggling with ideas for my first ever blog post, what to write about to make me sound interesting and encourage readers to come back. The truth is I nearly gave up on the idea altogether but here I am on a Monday afternoon, the electricity has gone out so I have nothing else to do so I thought I'd just give it a go. So I have decided for my first post I'll introduce myself and tell the story of how I fell in love with gaming.


My name is Bryan but most people call me Fu which is a nickname I inherited from my father (long story) and is how I came up with the name I used now for gaming. That name of course is Fualdinho and I'll try explain that name choice later. I turned 30 this year which terrified me at the time but I've got used to the fact now. I live in a small fishing village called Ardglass I have lived here my whole life. It's a quiet wee place the majority of the time and most people are friendly and polite. At times if you're looking from a favouritable angle it can be pretty picturesque too.


My earliest memory of playing a video game was in my best friend John's house I can't remember what the console was it was either a Comadore or an Atari. The game was a pixelated shooter reminiscent of space invaders but I don't think it was. All I can clearly remember was that you used a keyboard and/or a joystick to control your character. I can only ever remember playing it once with him though we were only kids at the time so spend as much time outdoors was the most important thing back then we'll either that or playing with toy soldiers in my grandmothers front hall.


The first console I can remember getting was the Sega master system. My Mum and Dad got it for me one Christmas, my favourite game was a little ninja game I think it might of been shinobi. I put so much time into that game and I don't think I ever got pasted the third or forth level. It was a frustrating game even my Dad and Uncle Gerald sat til sunrise trying to beat it one night. The next console we got was the NES I can remember it being so much better than the master system. With duck hunt you got to use a gun instead of a controller what more could you want at that age.


Then came the first time I ever came across FIFA on the Sega mega drive at my friend Neil's house, we had just got the mega drive in our house but we played Sonic and Golden Axe we didn't even know a football game existed it was ground breaking stuff. Unfortunately when my parents tried to buy it for us it had sold out in all the local shops. Months passed and just as we had forgot about it another friend told me his cousin was selling his copy for 5 pounds which to me seemed like the bargain of the century. After what seemed like hours of pleading with my mother of which tears were probably involved she finally gave in and bought it. Little did I know the reason she was so reluctant that very soon after was my birthday my 12th if I remember correctly and for my birthday I got the super Nintendo with Fifa International Soccer. I adored that game and honestly can never remember being defeated playing it.


Then follow a raft of consoles of which never really excited me including Sega saturn, sega dreamcast and the Nintendo 64. I never owned either of the Sega consoles so I never invested much time playing them. I admit Mario cart on the N64 was alot of fun but nothing could compare to what was just around the corner. It was just before Christmas and we watching TV while having dinner and then the advert for the Playstation came on, I was in awe it was like nothing I'd ever witnessed before. The graphics, the speed of the game play and how cool the console looked, all I knew is that I needed one in my life. When the advert finished me and both my brothers turned to my parents to enquire if Santa might be able to sort us out seeing as we had all been reasonably good boys that year.


When Christmas eventually came round Santa indeed sorted us out. The first game I played was of course Crash Bandicoot the star of the advert that made most young boys and some girls want the console in the first place. It was amazing how far of a step Playstation took over the other consoles, previous efforts were incomparable. I know most won't admit it but for me the best thing that happened during playstation was the chip you could buy in the market for a tenner and then the game were 3 pounds each or four for a tenner but we always got an extra free because my mum was friends with the stall holder. That chip saved my parents a small fortune and was probably the reason Sony brought out the Ps One which I got for birthday only to realise that you couldn't use the chip on it. 


The Playstation 2 was next on my radar I can't remember why but we never got it at launch but when we did I can remember being obsessed with the disc drawer and the purple discs. I also loved the black controllers they looked so sleek and felt like they were made for my hands. I admit as much as loved the PS2 I loved being a teenager more so I rarely got a chance to play it. Unless the boys fancied a Fifa or Tiger Woods session then I had more pressing issues although the ps2 was the first time I got to play a franchise I fell in love with. Call of Duty has been a big part of my life since the first time I played it.


Fast forward into my twenties and with Christmas approaching the Playstation 3 was launched and this was the first Christmas in a few years that I was single and had no one to buy for so it seemed the perfect excuse to treat myself. I bought the bundle that got an extra controller, smackdown v raw and uncharted. I bought myself need for speed pro street and my grandmother gave my the money to buy The Simpsons game. To say that was one of my favourite Christmas' would be an understatement I spend to whole day playing. The PS3 was where I really fell in love with gaming and introduced me to so many different game types and franchises. From God of War to Assassin's Creed to a game I originally owned but traded in Uncharted. Ps3 had modern warfare 2 which never left my console for many, many months and modern warfare 3 where my clan SWDY really dominated. It's also the console where I came across nazi zombies a game mode that has taken up so much of my free time. I think all I own about 150 games for the Playstation 3 and I enjoyed every single one of them.


And now we get to where we are now the Playstation 4 the greatest console of all time so good that for a while I owned two of them. I had my black one from launch which I recently sold and the unbelievably beautiful white one which the second I layed my eyes on I had to have. I admit to being slightly biased when it comes to Playstation but you can't argue with ps4 they have got it right. The graphics in games like Infamous and the order 1886 are phenomenal even the difference in games like Call of duty Ghosts and GTA V show how far this gen has come. The dualshock 4 is another great addition it feels like it belongs in your hands, the touch pad although it hasn't been fully utilised yet is another step forward as is the lightbar and the way it interacts with the Playstation camera. It's still early in its cycle too so it's only going to get better and better especially with games like Uncharted 4, Batman and Black ops 3 coming in the near future. It really is a good time to be a gamer right now and for me it's only going to get better.


I currently spend a majority of my time playing Fifa pro clubs and even competing in online leagues. I hope to one day manage my own league with the help of my brothers of course. I try to stream on twitch as much as I can but always forget to and hopefully soon will officially launch my YouTube channel. I plan to post on this at least once a week in a kinda "my week in gaming" thing were I can talk about what games I played and any milestones achieved or recommendations I may have. I also plan on keeping the Facebook page as up to date as possible with news and reviews.


So that's me done with my first post I hope you all enjoyed it. For those that are wondering why I never mentioned Xbox One or any hand helds, I do own an Xbox One but honestly rarely play it. I do like the "Xbone" but I love my ps4 and given the choice to play a game that's on both consoles it's a no contest. I bought the XBox for Call of dutys early dlc and Fifa legends as well as a few exclusives. As for hand helds I didn't mention them here as I wanted to speak about them in a different post of their own. Thanks again for reading and any comments are appreciated even constructive criticism.